Kind Of Caught It

I have been having these tachycardia 'events' for years

Have never been able to catch it with a monitor or ECG etc

I had an event the other night and thought to whip out my handy little blood pressure monitor and try and catch it

I think it gives an average of the heart rate ~ it was well over 180 bpm a few times.

I think I did well to get the machine on, and photograph it in the middle of one of my 'heart attacks' as I call them.

I guess I am used to them by now.

Only once have I struggled to stop it ~ I can slow my heart rate back down eventually but it takes a lot of breath holding and flipping over 'valsalva maneuver' or something it's called 

Still Here...

Yes, still here....

Meeting, dinner and 'huge hews disclosure' went fairly well last night - as far as the food went anyway.

I was dreading the whole thing, as you know.
Probably because once they knew, that's it - it's happening.

GX (one of my managers) was totally bamboozled by the new structure - especially as to how it will work for him.
PB already knew - I told him last week - so he was prepped to help explain it all - I don't think having both of them in complete shock would work too well.

PB has been very supportive, he knows the impact of this on me and is trying to help as much as possible - he immediately suggested that I should 'take some of mine' - his area.
GX was told last night that he will need to give some of his to me - but I don't think it's sunken in.
I did have to leave the room when my boss was explaining that they would be no longer under my 'umbrella' - that was a bit hard to take.

So now I have the news to share with one other manager - and it's not good for her. She won't qualify and will have to come back under me, for less commission.

Gee I made one of the nicest lasagne's I've possibly ever cooked though!
I cooked everything Monday night - until the wee hours of Tuesday morning.
A chicken curry that they all raved about - I made up the recipe - I'll be making it again I think :)
And some apple crumble for dessert.
I made extra of each so that I won't have to cook tonight...yay!

I was well and truly ready for bed at 10.30pm - having only had 5 hours sleep the night before.

Today I have felt really, really good.
I'm not sure if it's just that the house is clean and tidy, that last night is now behind me or maybe a combination of both - but gee I have caught up on some small jobs and errands that I've been putting off/haven't had time for - and I have packed my order already which is quite early...

If only I could feel this switched on every day life would be a breeze!

No test results for Possum as yet - I have doubled the iron I am giving him and he seems to have picked up in the last 48 hours - I will ring for the results Friday.
The fact that they haven't called me must be a good sign.

So I'm off now to chill out until Big A gets home,
busy day again tomorrow,

G
xx

p.s. Oh and I've lost almost 4kg.... :)

Finally....

I have finally been able to scan these!
I have scanned a few photos recently and just might go through some of my favourites, scan them and burn to disc - you never know.

Small Man aged 13 weeks, age 1 (photo taken on his 1st Birthday/Christening - although he was looking a little solemn!) and then again at age 4.
I had planned to post them on his birthday recently...but stuff happened!

I can't believe my baby is 14 - but then he looks like he's 17 so.........
We had a fun night for his birthday, with friends over to stay the night, pizza and plenty of guitar hero rock band.
Our friends have been great friends for 15 years, they also have two boys the same age as our fellows - actually their younger son turned 15 the day after Small Man turned 14 - uncanny!
So they shared their birthdays!

The hubbys had a few beers, us girls had a few cokes, and a few coffees/milos and one glass of wine (actually half a glass for me...) - and Big A and I both ended up getting a reading done by my very talented psychic/artistic/reiki abled Mary.
Actually, we sat up and talked until 3am!

No internet for almost three days hasn't been fun!
We have changed back to Telstra a few weeks ago and have had 'issues' this week, way too boring to mention!
I had to do an emergency run to PB's house yesterday to pay my work account....ooops!
Big A had to sit through my 'shows' on Austar the other night - Americas Next Top Model just to name one - ha ha! He was so bored without his online gaming bizzo.

He has almost recovered from the flu - almost.
His work Christmas bash is on tomorrow night - but we're not going.
For a variety of reasons.
The dinner is going to be in the town where he works - he really doesn't feel like driving down there again this week - it's about 50 minutes away.
Hardly anyone that I know will be there (not that I really care mind you but he does).
Z17 is working tomorrow night, so Small Man would be home on his own for quite a while, he'd be fine of course but I often feel that he spends enough time alone.
Reviews from friends that have been to the restaurant (?) where the dinner is being held have been very negative with regard to the food.
Big A is doing a job for someone Saturday morning so needs to be up early....
So, it's a no go!


G
xxx

Nearly chickened out....

It's hard to believe this was only 5 years and almost 20 kgs ago.........
Taken on Hamilton Island in 2003.
I almost chickened out posting this - but I thought nope - this is my goal!!!


I went from fearless helicopter rides......
To barely wanting to leave the house.....


It's amazing the effect weight gain has on your whole 'being'.
So far nothing I have tried has worked until now.
It is a sensible eating plan.....just very low carb, higher protein - hey you can even have a rasher of bacon!

If anyone would like a copy of the 7 day plan that I have email me (pooky_bear_me@hotmail.com) I'll scan it and send to you!

G
xxx

The new 'Do

Not the best quality photos - the lighting wasn't bright enough - but when do you see teenage boys in the daylight? *chuckle*

He was in the middle of an animated discussion with his brother over GTA4 or whatever it's called - some of the expressions I captured were hilarious!

He looks very different with his hair short - I'm still getting used to it - I like that we are now able to see what he looks like - but I do miss the curls!

I have no idea why my words are being underlined!!!

I can't find a solution to this!!!!

G
xx

FIREWORKS!

Indeed there were!

Some favourite photos of Z16 and Small Man - and a few random fireworks from 'Cracker Night' Saturday Night...

I took the boys up to 'The Lakes' to Mums shack.
It was a freezing night, as it always is up there.
They had a ball!
Big A had to work night shift for the weekend - so I loaded up with explosives, coke and pumpkin soup and up we trekked!

A good night - SF had to spoil it later of course - more on that later.

I think I'm still thawing out!

G
xx

Decidedly LESS Slack....

I have scanned these.....so here they are!
The four of us above....

The happy couple!


Dopey bride trying to get out of the car in rather big dress and look elegant at the same time - FAIL!!! He he he!

Mum made my dress, veil and hooped petticoat, and the boys waistcoats - she is very talented!
I made my headpiece (from wire and gold thread), Mum made the rosettes for it.
I couldn't find antique gold shoes anywhere, so bought cream ones and spray painted them!!
The theme was ivory and gold.
We were on a pretty extreme budget, we had approx 60 guests and were married in a little chapel (by a marriage celebrant) next to a lake. It was small but sweet.

I'm pleased to have scanned these now!

G
xx

Happy Anniversary!

Today is our 12th Wedding Anniversary.........

This is a photo of a photo so not the best quality (things weren't as digital back then - I only have the photo's nothing on a disk) ....but anyway!

It had rained a little, the water was still....the day went off without a hitch!
The photo of the photo is clearer if you click on it.....

G
xx

When you're hot - you're hot!!!

OK

So not only does clever clogs pass his exam on the first attempt........
He has been asked to give tutorials for others before they take the exam

It's the first time in ten years that someone at his work has passed the test first time!

*sigh*

He's a work that one! We are all so proud of him!!!

I admit I am a slightly envious of the positive accolades he receives (not because I think he isn't worthy!)

It's just that I haven't had that for so long I've forgotten what it's like :-(

But anyway.........

I was thinking about happiness today

As you do!

And came to the realisation that there isn't enough joy in my life at present - actually make that I'm not feeling enough joy

So I am wondering how I can change that.

I realised that I hardly ever smile these days

Good for the wrinkles, not good for the soul.

Not that it takes more to make me smile

Just that there hasn't been much to warrant it.

I'm not frowning either though - just expressionless.

Not feeling sorry for myself, just taking an honest 'good hard look' at myself.
And what I can change, and what I can't.

It has been another long few days though.

After getting such wonderful positive news about the exams I was feeling elated!
This was followed by a great morning with PK - talking about everything from a-z then back again - hey we even managed to get some work done on maps etc.
We had coffee/milo and cake and a few smokes - it was all good.
He is feeling really good at the moment - he has closed the book on several areas of grief and is moving ahead positively - so nice to see.

Just as he was leaving Thursday afternoon, the phone rings.....

More trouble created, more situations twisted, more drama, more mountains made from molehills............it never ends...........or maybe it will!
BBB is coming over - and is meeting with one of my SD's and I next Friday night.
To sort out this 'huge' (dripping with sarcasm) something about nothing (at her request, no doubt).
He is going to get more than he bargained for and so is SHE - the TRUTH - uncut and in person.
Let's just say a perfectly good day was ruined.
I am now stressed to the max.
I was in bed at 6.30pm last night - my nerves were shot to pieces.
Enough said on that.

I still hadn't heard from the Professor re: Small Man.
So I emailed him Wednesday.
I told him a lot more than I was able to at our appointment, quite a lot.
Many 'personal' things regarding the effects this is having on Small, and our family.
He called me that same afternoon!

He is consulting with another Paediatric expert in Melbourne - and I should hear from one of them early next week to discuss options.
Small Man seems to be a getting a little worse. Physically, not emotionally.
He catches everything that's going around, and everything that isn't - and it knocks him flat.
No school last week, we'll see how he goes this week - I'm not holding my breath.

So anyway - a mixed bag from me!

G
xx

PEEPING TOM!

This little guy was peering though my kitchen window earlier tonight - so I grabbed a few photos of him!

G
xx

Hello There!

George - posing again!

G
xx

Thoughts Gathered

George and I had a lovely big sleep

He's still draped over my bed

It's a cats life!

I have woken feeling much clearer in my thoughts - and the idea of getting through the day isn't daunting as it was yesterday.

I ended up with a cracking migraine last night - which explains a bit.

Z16 worked until Midnight - but it was nearly 12.30am by the time he clocked off.

It's a beautiful day here, sunny with a nice breeze - handy when your washing has been neglected and your son is down to two pairs of jeans...both of which need washing and take ages to dry!

I have saved 5 listings to upload to eBay tonight....I have saved up a few draw card items for 'emergencies' and have a huge stack of clothes that need to go....some good brands amongst it all - Alannah Hill, Cooper Street, Nike etc

It will be nice to bolster the paypal account a little (or at all!) - I have been looking but not buying much - aside from some Diesel Green deodorant for Z16 - it's his smell - it's gorgeous - I have been buying it for him since he was 13/14 - one stick or can lasts him 6 months - so $17.00 isn't really extravagant. I have also found cologne and body wash to match. It's getting hard to find, so usually comes from eBay UK.
I also score Diesel t-shirts and jeans where I can - I found a genuine pair at the op-shop - they were still running dye when I bought them, and had that "I'm brand new" feel - they had been altered and I'm guessing they were too short after the alteration - perfect for him though.

Anyway,
I'm off to make myself useful!

Enjoy your day,

G
xx

~**One More Sleep**~

Only one more sleep until we go to the surgeon in Hobart.......

I'm nervous about:

Driving/finding my way around

What the surgeon's going to say....yes/no

How Small Man's going to cope with the trip

How Z16 is going to get home tomorrow night

If the surgeon agrees, how long will we have to wait

Just the usual really......!

I'm no good at this

I have so much to do, but can't focus.....

As far as certain people that want to come around here and annoy the crap out of me on Friday go - they can wait til next week. I'm not running a coffee lounge. She only wants to repeat, over and over, the crap she had to say on the phone the other day. Tough. Not up for her games at present.

G
xxx

Oh dear - I dunno......!!!

BLOODY HAIR!!!!!!

Have done my hair - "Light Brown" - uh nuh......

The first photo is before......

The second one is last night, after the blonde highlights......and some more extension put it.....

The third one is this morning, after the "light brown"

God it seems far too dark,
it may be my 'natural' colour,
but I don't think I like it much...........
it better wash out!!!!

Oh, and no I hate smiling for photos, especially ones I am taking of myself!!!! And when my hair looks crap!!! Haw haw!

Crap,
Looks like a bandanna situation!!!!

G
xx

Cuteness!!!

We had a lovely afternoon.....

Z16 went to work......

Small Man and I went to my brothers house,
to see his dear little girl Bethany and wish her a Happy 4th Birthday,
we missed her actual birthday which was the weekend the out laws were here.

Bethany is now staying overnight,
and will be for the next three Saturdays in a row!
Sounds like Mum has a taste for it now!
It's great news for us though!

We had a great time playing with his other gorgeous baby Oscar - a mischievous and EXTREMELY adorable Birman kitten (same as my George, only he's a blue point, and George is a seal point),

Things got really interesting when my brother let his pet cockatoo out of it's cage! Baby Birmans have no business trying to stalk cockatoos! Oscars was crouching, behind Small Mans legs at one stage, trying to figure out how he could catch Cocky........hilarious!

We took my brothers car for a spin, Bethany in tow....
When we got in the car, she asked me in all seriousness - "Aunty Gina, do you know how to drive?"
So cute!
Gee I have no idea - my brother sent me to the bottle shop - with $15 - to get some beer. I knew what sort, but had no idea how many you might buy for $15 - so just handed it over to the bottle shop man and asked for as many beers as I could get for $15!
The answer is 6 - in case you were wondering!

We grabbed KFC - tsk tsk - oh well, it's not like we do it often.
A cheap shout with Big A away, and Z16 at work!

I ran a bath for Bethany, and we had a lovely chat whilst she was bathing - and washing feet but not the 'sore bit' (a graze on her foot)......
Ringlets secured on top of head so as not to get hair wet (as per Mums instructions).......during which she looked up at me, with my brothers eyes and said - "Aunty Gina, I'm going to miss you tonight when you go".....

I'm going to be looking forward to the next few weekends!

G
xx

And Just Like That.....

He was all grown up and going to College.......

I feel old, but not old enough all at once,
not sure how that works!

That 'empty nest' feeling is back with a vengeance today......

G
xx

Here Tis!

...

Another Favourite

This photo is already in my facebook album, but it makes me smile so I'm blogging it too!

This is Small Man at physio - in the hubbard tank - a pressurised/heated tank for minimal impact exercise....we go twice a week once in the tank, once in the gym...for now!


G
xx

My 100th Blog!

Adding my two favourite recent photos to celebrate!

Walking behind a stranger....

That's how it felt, walking behind my young man, in his suit, with straight hair!
It was all very much worth it.........xxx